Did you know that there are genetic gifts shared by leaders, entrepreneurs, Navy SEALs, and athletes?
Why is it that highly driven individuals, despite their accomplishments, sometimes feel held back by self-doubt? Dr. Doug Brackmann, with two PhDs in psychology, has dedicated his life to unraveling this mystery.
Join us in this episode of the Success Through Failure podcast as we explore the interplay between addiction, genetics, and the unique challenges faced by highly driven individuals, and how it manifests in various aspects of life.
In our conversation, Dr. Brackmann delves into mastering your physiology and mindset, unlocking states of flow, and breaking free from self-imposed limitations. So if you’ve ever felt the tension between your relentless drive and nagging self-doubt, this episode is a must-listen.
But make no mistake: this episode isn’t just for high achievers; it’s for anyone striving for success in their personal and professional life. So, whether you’re a podcast enthusiast, a book lover, or someone who’s just fascinated with conversations about performance, don’t miss out. Join the conversation and learn how to break free from self-imposed limitations and tap into the extraordinary success that lies within you.
If you don’t have time to listen to the entire episode or if you hear something that you like but don’t have time to write it down, be sure to grab your free copy of the Action Plan from this episode— as well as get access to action plans from EVERY episode— at JimHarshawJr.com/Action.
[00:00] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: Have you ever felt unstoppable in your drive, but you still feel chained back and held back by your self doubt? Like, why do the most driven people often sabotage their own success? That is exactly the mystery we're going to solve for you today. Welcome to another episode of Success Through Failure, the show for successful people and for those who want to become successful.
[00:27] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: The only show that reveals the true nature of success. This is your host, Jim Harshaw, Jr. And today I bring you Dr. Doug Fletcher. Brackman. Today's episode is for every high achiever who has ever had that, that haunting internal sense that you're just not enough. Like if you've ever wondered why you have had that, you know, despite all of the, the boxes that you've checked, all the accomplishments that you have, why you sometimes still feel like you're holding yourself back while you're in the right place, because today we're going to be talking about this with Dr.
[01:05] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: Doug Brackman. This guy holds two PhDs in psychology, and he has dedicated his life to just really unraveling that mystery behind self sabotage failing, despite all of the reasons why we have to succeed that internal battle that highly driven people. Deal with, and his website is actually called, I am driven.
[01:30] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: That's the name of his podcast. I was a guest on his podcast a while back. And today we're going to be talking about from the boardroom to the locker room, CEO desk to, to, you know, putting your foot on the line as a starting as an athlete, all these mindsets of high performers of driven people. We'll be talking about that.
[01:49] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: Nobody understands this more. I think than Dr. Doug Brackman is you'll see from our conversation today, he really understands this unique. tension, this tension between having this high, high level of drive, but also this doubt that can creep in and how that holds you back and really how to unlock that and unlock your true potential.
[02:08] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: So we do a deep dive into how to master your physiology, how to master your mindset, how to unlock states of flow and really break those, those chains of self imposed limitation and self sabotage. So who do you know that would love this episode? Who do you know that Listens to podcasts like this, you know, reads books like this, loves to have conversations about performance and being driven and success and failure and everything in between, let them know, give this episode a share.
[02:39] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: This is episode number 431 of the success through failure podcast. Thank you for sharing. All right, here we go. My interview with Dr. Doug Brackman. You've got a fascinating background. Your career began working in a rehabilitation facility, treating addiction and anxiety and depression. How does understanding the psychology behind addiction, how does that inform the work that you do today and helping your clients achieve success?
[03:06] Dr. Doug Brackmann: So we, and I do mean we, you included, have the addictive wiring and genetic kind of gift and curse of a very select, about 8, 10 percent of human beings have a very different set of genetics. And we are wired for It's really a much harder, difficult world. And back in 1991, when I entered graduate school, um, whatever anybody says as a psychologist, all psychologists get into psychology to figure out their own crap.
[03:41] Dr. Doug Brackmann: And so I was in it to figure out what I am and how I work. And so struggling with early addictions on my high school dropout, lived in a car, blew my life up early. And figured out very quickly, I didn't want to do that. So I went back into grad school in, in 91. I mean, if you remember back, we, we had pagers and I had a PC, a 486 processing computer, and I went to grad school with, so it was a very different world.
[04:10] Dr. Doug Brackmann: We had just cracked the human genome, and a Time Magazine article came out that they found the alcoholism genes, and very quickly they discovered that was the dopamine receptor number two that they were looking at. Very quickly they discovered that it was also related to high performers. Also related to gambling addiction and all kinds of addictive qualities.
[04:34] Dr. Doug Brackmann: And in the intervening three years now, we have discovered very much that genetics, it's not nature versus nurture anymore. The answer is yes, it is both nature and nurture. So we do have an underlying genetic Gift, you know, that propels us to feel like there's always something missing or wrong in the world.
[04:55] Dr. Doug Brackmann: And that tends to make high performers. If you choose to believe that, you know, the next success will lead to getting rid of this feeling of not enough. And so it's a, it's, it is the rocket fuel behind most of, I'm sure most of your listeners and most of what we are.
[05:11] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: So it's interesting to hear that this connection between addiction and high performance and being driven is genetic.
[05:20] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: I interviewed a guy named Charlie Angle back in episode 213. So the listeners might be interested in listening to that episode. Well, Charlie has a horrible sort of addiction story. I mean, just hit rock bottom and. Decided to go for a run one day and he's pretty much never stopped running. I mean, he ran across the Sahara desert.
[05:43] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: I mean, this guy's just done incredible feats. It's just a new addiction. And he admits it. Like it's this new addiction that he has. I wonder, you know, what separates somebody like you and me, like I, I've never been addicted to drugs, but what it sounds like is I have the capacity to be potentially addicted to drugs or something, right?
[06:04] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: I'm addicted to hard work and. Stuff like that, like what's the line there? What's the separator? Is it life experience? Is there another factor here too that separates that like trauma potentially?
[06:16] Dr. Doug Brackmann: Yes, it is incredibly complex, but what is addiction? And, you know, consequences and, you know, and as I always joke with all my clients, you know, because we are wired for addiction, choose your addictions wisely, but choose them.
[06:34] Dr. Doug Brackmann: Otherwise they'll choose you. So that ability to have insight. Into the consequences of your addiction. And, you know, as a, as I always joke, a recovering Ironman triathlete, Ironman for 10 years. And those are neurochemicals that I became addicted to. They were just, you know, released in my body by intense exercise and the consequences, you know, I have hip issues and knee issues at 55 and.
[07:02] Dr. Doug Brackmann: Is the consequence of the addiction outweighing the benefit and that's the classic model of addiction and, you know, my early, early addiction and, you know, profoundly grateful and this leads into my doctoral research and really, you know, what I'm hoping this conversation gets into was this awareness that I was not in control of myself any longer with my addictions.
[07:27] Dr. Doug Brackmann: And so at 16, I discovered how to freebase cocaine, which is what blew up Richard Breyer. And this was mid eighties and you know, it's a liquid ether and cocaine freeze the base and then you smoke it and it is profoundly addicting. And I could not stop. And so who's really in control of me? And that led into my doctoral dissertation about self sabotage.
[07:51] Dr. Doug Brackmann: and again, this was back in the mid nineties and we didn't have the functional MRI like we do now. We didn't really understand who's in control of the human being. And so for an addictive person like I am, which feels like there's the dopamine receptors. That I'm gifted with. Dopamine receptor number two is boredom.
[08:13] Dr. Doug Brackmann: And most people, 95 percent of the world don't experience boredom. They don't know what it feels like to feel lazy. And so I'm sitting on the couch and God, I just feel lazy. I need to get out. I need to go do something. I, you know, corner, most of my understanding of driven says, you know, the hunter farmer theory that.
[08:35] Dr. Doug Brackmann: 5, 000 years ago, most of the human species adapted to this boring, predictable, safe, agricultural world where we have the hunting genetics, where we very quickly, if we're stuck in the cave for too long, feel like there's something missing or wrong. Where farmers felt that they would get away from their crops.
[08:56] Dr. Doug Brackmann: If we didn't feel that we'd never get out of the cave and go survive.
[09:01] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: Quick interruption. Hey, if you like what you're hearing, be sure to get the notes, quotes, and links in the action plan from this episode, just go to JimHarshawJr.com/action. That's JimHarshawJr.com/action to get your free copy of the action plan.
[09:16] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: Now back to the show. I mean, I would argue that a lot of people do feel like there's something missing or wrong, maybe driven even more so. So maybe there's just this, this sort of leftover wiring from those days when not everybody quite made the transition fully to farmer, right. And sitting around being bored and some people are, I guess, okay with that, but I, I.
[09:39] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: I do feel like a lot of the population feels like there's something missing, something wrong. And I don't know that this conversation has the bandwidth to go into that, but I do feel like we as humans are, all of us, none of us are supposed to be sitting around looking at a screen all day in one room, you know, just doing what we do.
[10:03] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: It's not much.
[10:04] Dr. Doug Brackmann: Maybe the listeners can attest, but you know, my running joke is I'm unemployable. I cannot sit in a eight by eight cubicle and look at a computer screen, you know, returning TPS reports. I just can't do it. It makes me insane because it feels so unlike what I'm wired to be. Where most of the human population can do that.
[10:28] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: They can do it. I think most of them aren't happy about it. They still feel like something's wrong. Maybe you and I. Couldn't do that, right? Maybe are unemployable.
[10:36] Dr. Doug Brackmann: That goes into this, the conversation around who's really in control of me because, you know, second grade, third grade, fourth grade, fifth grade, you know, this was way before the ADD, ADHD world.
[10:49] Dr. Doug Brackmann: You know, medication and all that, and I was just a restless kid and, you know, I had to poke the guy next to me and that impulsive kind of way of being in the world is the underlying genetic gift that I have that I have to. I don't have a choice in this drivenness for more dopamine. And you know, when I'm somewhere between mile 14 and 16 and an iron man on the run, all of that seems to go away.
[11:26] Dr. Doug Brackmann: And I seem to be in this amazing flow state where I'm doing and achieving and experiencing a sense of presence and wholeness. That is what I became profoundly addicted to. And. From the outside looking in, that's crazy, you know, and I always joke about, you know, particular those of us that are driven, we live in bubbles.
[11:48] Dr. Doug Brackmann: You want to go see what normal is, go averages, go scan in line of Walmart. That's normal. Go look at Disneyland, go look at the line at Disneyland. And you know, this, this terrible fear that I'm going to be average. As Kenneth Blum said, and one of the early researchers in this, we, he coined it reward deficiency syndrome, that no matter what we do, we always feel like we could have done it better.
[12:15] Dr. Doug Brackmann: And so that drivenness and that this, you know, my doctoral dissertation led into self sabotage, led into this understanding about, you know, why does January suck at the gym for those of us that are gym rats? Because everybody who temporarily feels this, yeah, I got to get in shape and I got to, you know, January it's packed, but what happens by February and that's what, you know, I just did this slide for a presentation by February 14th.
[12:45] Dr. Doug Brackmann: 78 percent of people don't remember their New Year's resolutions, and so they go back to sleep. They're comfortable with average. I am in the gym, you know, watching that, you know, it pisses me off, but then it's back to normal. And I'm, I'm still in the gym in February, March, April, May, June, July, because I have to be.
[13:05] Dr. Doug Brackmann: And so, you know, if you've got these genetics and you're listening to this show. There's nothing wrong with you, but you are different. We are different, but who's in control. And this, you know, success through failure podcast is really about what does success mean and what does it mean for me? You know, and that's my imposter syndrome, which is something I have been plagued with and why I have, I actually have two PhDs, which is stupid.
[13:32] Dr. Doug Brackmann: That's ridiculous. It is. And, you know, trying to get rid of this feeling of not feeling smart enough, hoping that I would achieve something in the outer world to get rid of an inner world experience. Yeah.
[13:48] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: So you, you, you get one PhD and boy, maybe there's still some gaps in my game. I can't, I can't let people see that I've got to get another PhD.
[13:57] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: So you get another PhD, do these achievements change anything for you?
[14:02] Dr. Doug Brackmann: They don't get rid of this underlying inner ache that there's still something more that I could do. And that underlying inner ache is the gift, if you harness it. It runs you, it is making decisions for you. That is where addiction comes in, and you can destroy your body.
[14:21] Dr. Doug Brackmann: And it led into my doctoral research about really who's in charge of me. And we have two operating systems. We got one, you know, the, the belief system up between the ears, that's the brain and the Buddha called it the monkey mind. And it can imagine unbelievably successful worlds. It can imagine standing on the podium and imagine how great it's going to feel.
[14:47] Dr. Doug Brackmann: But then we have another operating system down below the nose. And it's gold is very different than the one between the ears. The one down below the nose, once the familiar world,
[14:58] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: this is like what you would say below the nose is this heart feeling
[15:01] Dr. Doug Brackmann: got whole body. The brain is between the years. The mind is from the top of the head to the tip of the toes.
[15:09] Dr. Doug Brackmann: And so when people talk about mindset, it's really about body set. Can you experience success in the body? And can you, you know, visualization and all of those tricks and tools that all the sports psychologists, which I'm a big proponent of, being able to really feel what it's going to feel like. And that lottery winners is a great example because, you know, I do this on stage with people.
[15:35] Dr. Doug Brackmann: What, what would it feel like to win the lottery? Oh, it would be amazing. Really? Who's the first one of your family members that's going to call you and ask for money? How's that going to feel? And you're like, Oh, and so the reality versus the fantasy, how will it really feel to, to win the state champions?
[16:00] Dr. Doug Brackmann: Oh, it'll be amazing. Will it? And so Seeing how the difference between what's happening between your ears and the reality of winning.
[16:12] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: Yeah. And also just the belief that you can win, like you can believe it at a logical level, you know, at the brain, but, but in the mind, the rest of the body. Do you actually believe and feel that this thing can happen?
[16:27] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: And I think that's the real disconnect. There's the logical brain. Sure. Of course, I know that logically I can do that thing because I've seen other people do it. I see them, you know, on the internet, I see them on TV, whatever. I can do that thing because I have the same skill set or I can acquire those skills.
[16:44] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: It's the rest. It's the other part. That if you don't connect that, it doesn't happen. And I know that from experience, you and I talked about this when I was on your podcast for the listeners, I was on Doug's podcast called I am driven. And we talked about this, but I went through a, through a lot of years of wrestling where I was failing and I knew at a logical level that I could succeed, but it wasn't until I believed at an emotional level that I could succeed.
[17:11] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: And I want you to maybe. Dissect this a little bit, Doug. I still had the desire to succeed, to get onto the podium at the national championships, but at the same time, I also let go of that. And when I let go of it, almost maybe allowed. Gave permission to my body, my mind, my everything else to actually go in, perform at that level and bring my full being to a competition or for the listener.
[17:40] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: It might be a interview. Sales presentation, whatever it might be a conversation that you have, tough conversation you have to have whenever you can separate those two or even connect them, it, you know, it's a kind of a weird way to think about it. Like, how does that happen? What does that happen, Doug?
[17:59] Dr. Doug Brackmann: Yeah. So this, you are encapsulating in a question, 35 years of research and study and basically by life. And it is. You know, beliefs are simple and I call beliefs, you know, this, I believe it in my head, but do you know it in your knower and that knowing in your body, do you really know it? Do you know you can win?
[18:22] Dr. Doug Brackmann: And that's where
[18:23] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: visualization comes from. Like you can create that momentarily in your body, that feeling that you can then carry into the competition or the sales presentation
[18:34] Dr. Doug Brackmann: or whatever. It is meditation. I mean, there have been a big understanding of meditation, but meditation is not trying to relax.
[18:42] Dr. Doug Brackmann: It has nothing to do with that. What meditation truly is experiencing the present moment. And if you can visualize, how, how will it feel to stand on a podium? How will it feel to close a million dollar deal? The answer is, I don't know. I don't have a clue. Well, put yourself there and how will it feel?
[19:07] Dr. Doug Brackmann: And well, it's going to feel great. Is it? And it's that, is it curiosity that allows the body allows this physiological central nervous system to be met with curiosity and then open up the possibilities that it might not be that great as it might be that, but I don't know how it's going to be.
[19:27] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: I want to explore that a little bit.
[19:28] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: Like, you know, whenever I achieve my goal, I visualize it, you know, I'm just going back to the sort of sports analogy here, cause I think that's sort of the most easy one to metaphor to, to use here. It was amazing. Like when I achieved that, I visualize it and it was amazing. And I'm still really grateful for that experience.
[19:47] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: And I do the same thing in my, I visualize myself doing what we're doing right now. When I had a full time job, nine to five, doing jobs that I didn't necessarily want to do or terrible job wasn't digging ditches or anything, but I visualize doing this now. And I visualize it being amazing. And it is amazing.
[20:05] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: Sometimes I forget how amazing it is. And I go, wait a second. You could be doing that other thing again. I'm like, Oh, this is actually
[20:10] Dr. Doug Brackmann: really freaking cool. It's the contrast between what I expect it to be versus the reality of it. And I worked, you know, for years and years with pro golfers and how will it feel Jordan speed to make a seven foot putt and win 10, 10 million bucks.
[20:28] Dr. Doug Brackmann: Oh, that's going to be great. Are you sure? Well, it's probably going to feel just like any other putt I've ever made. Yeah, it will. Exactly. You've done this putt 10, 000 times. It's nothing new. You know how to do this. Yeah, but it's a win. No, it's no different than anything else you've ever done. And so is that possible?
[20:52] Dr. Doug Brackmann: Oh, I, I know I can do that. Yeah, but the 10 Well, the 10 million doesn't exist for the body that only exists in your head and the million dollar clothes. No, that only exists in your head. The body is just doing what it already knows how to do. How do you close a 10 million deal or whatever it is? You connect with the person you're trying to sell to.
[21:16] Dr. Doug Brackmann: You stop trying to sell and you connect and you're there and you're present and you're in, you're really trying to help mode something 10, 000 times. We'll just do that again and see what happens. Yeah, but my head thinks, yeah, exactly. Your beliefs are getting in the way of your wind and that, that ability to discern that and feel into the difference that I've already done this.
[21:41] Dr. Doug Brackmann: This is nothing new. And that's my joke about, you know, golfers is their body knows how to go and hit a 62 any day of the week. And it's their head that gets in the way. And so surrender and you said giving permission, giving yourself permission for this to be easy for
[22:00] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: the listener who's sitting there saying, yeah, but I, I don't, you know, I'm not competing on a golf course or a wrestling mat or anything like, how does this really apply to me?
[22:12] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: I wake up and, you know, kids and work and life. It's just kind of a bunch of busy ness for me. I really want. To get to that next thing. I don't, maybe don't even know what that next thing is, but it kind of, I want more out of my life. I want to make more money. I want the bigger house, the better car, the whatever it might be.
[22:33] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: How is this relevant to them?
[22:36] Dr. Doug Brackmann: What I do with all of my clients is teach them that they really don't know how their life feels. That's first and foremost. And the, the, you know, the struggle we're in just to get by for most of us in particular, if you're driven, it really isn't that big of a struggle. It really isn't.
[22:57] Dr. Doug Brackmann: And, you know, being able to appreciate the mundane, being able to really feel into, this is your life. You're living. Today is not preparation for some other day. This is your life. Yeah, but I need to do more. And that contrast. Well, this kind of sucks because I'm not doing enough. No, that's not true. How does it feel to live your life?
[23:20] Dr. Doug Brackmann: And I did a, you know, French toast making meditation for a four year old and a three year old. Oh, that sucks. No, it's amazing. And it's screaming kids. And you didn't cut the cuts, crush, right. And you did, you did. But the whole catastrophe is amazing. Well, it would be better. And you did it with contrasting.
[23:40] Dr. Doug Brackmann: Well, I'm in a shitty nine to five job and it sucks. What sucks about it? Well, I'm not in control of my own life. Oh, I need to be in control of my own life. That's going to be wonderful. Then I have so much more freedom. And that's true. And how does that feel? And if you can get your body to actually experience that new truth that I don't want to be, I don't want to have a boss.
[24:03] Dr. Doug Brackmann: Oh, that's awesome. But what else is it going to be? Holy crap. I don't have a boss. Holy crap. I'm responsible for all of it now. And you can feel into the reality of it. And, you know, coming back to, you know, how do you prepare for change is you feel your way through it. And you're open to the, the good and the bad, the whole, the wholeness of the experience, and it allows you to get out of your expecting head that's ruining everything and really feel into the possibility.
[24:37] Dr. Doug Brackmann: And, you know, I know how to manage money. Do you? And if you don't have a boss and you don't get AW two check anymore, it's like you better really figure out how to manage money Well, how does it feel to manage money? Well, scary. Is it? No, it's math. Well, and so you're able to actually bring the real, the nowhere along for the ride.
[24:58] Dr. Doug Brackmann: And, you know, self-sabotage. And why January sucks at the gym is because everybody's expecting, you know, this, this new gym body to occur overnight. No, it's hard. It sucks. Week three, week four, getting back into shape is terrible. If you expect that and you know it, and you actually are experiencing that along the way, if the contrast between how you thought it was going to be and how it really is becomes much more doable and much more achievable.
[25:26] Dr. Doug Brackmann: And it, this, you know, practice makes perfect, no practice makes it familiar and practice that familiar then allows you just to do what I'm just, all I got to do is do what I've always done. And if you do it in incremental improvements, eventually you'll start to win, you will. And it is, uh, it's a very different way of actually looking at the way human beings work in the world.
[25:51] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: It sounds like. What's underneath all of this is kind of back to the basics of mindfulness and gratitude. Is that right? I mean, these key underpinnings of what
[26:03] Dr. Doug Brackmann: you teach. Very much. Yeah. Where mindfulness is, you know, I always in the West here, you know, the mind is body fullness. It's really the experiencing.
[26:15] Dr. Doug Brackmann: it where you're not watching the experience, you're having the experience and then gratitude. Gratitude practice is something essential because what gratitude does is opens you up to what you're not seeing. And we as human beings, you know, we're a fear based monkey. And so we always are looking for the snakes.
[26:34] Dr. Doug Brackmann: And if you're scared, your body's full of fear, you will see snakes. That's all you'll see. Gratitude is what am I not seeing? And you open up, you know, there are a lot of sticks here and there's a lot of things that aren't even snakes. and so then your body starts to experience reality more and, you know, that experiencing the reality of it, it's an old Zen joke that if once you, you ever truly experienced reality, you wind up as a crying just mess because you're so overwhelmed with the amazement of just being alive.
[27:09] Dr. Doug Brackmann: Yeah.
[27:10] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: You know. I think of this often whenever you think about something that you lose, and I'm thinking about a particular family member who lost somebody very, very close to her. And if you could just have that person back for a day, the overwhelming joy that would come would be incredible. We had that person.
[27:34] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: Prior to that for a day and we weren't joyful then, right. And I think about that now, like all these things that we take for granted, you know, people and things I'm, I'm, I pulled up my journal as, as we were talking here, I I'm in the middle of with my clients, my whole. Community of clients. We're doing a challenge right now.
[27:52] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: And every, you know, everybody sort of designs their own child. There's all these great challenges out there, you know, whole 30 and a 75 hard. It was like, well, we create one specifically for you. Everybody creates their own. And for me, we, one of the things that I do is I write down three things I'm grateful for every morning.
[28:08] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: And today I wrote down clean water. Pretty freaking amazing. There are a lot of people in this world who would love to have clean water, heat and air conditioning, a comfortable home. Pretty amazing, really, when you think about it. Right. Um, and then friends just old and new friends, like my goodness. And that little, just small, tiny dose of gratitude just changes the course of your day and your mindset.
[28:36] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: And there is a, there's just a ripple effect of that. And so for the listener, like you actually have to. Do the stuff to make it work
[28:46] Dr. Doug Brackmann: and teaching all of my clients. And we have such a cortisol addiction, particularly driven people, you know, we're wired for a harder world and we make our world so hard compared to most, we do hardship.
[29:03] Dr. Doug Brackmann: That's where we feel most alive. And I don't want to give up my fear because it's the thing that's driving me. And it's actually the opposite of all of my research, and that came out of my doctoral dissertation is that when you open yourself up to the newness of gratitude and appreciation and all of these things, wins become easier because you're more than just expecting, you're anticipating the good feelings.
[29:29] Dr. Doug Brackmann: And the path to the good feeling becomes much more obvious. What you need to work on becomes much more obvious. And it is, as you say it, the mindset, the body set changes. And throughout the day, then you, you will notice more things that you're grateful for that you normally are tuning out. And, you know, the habit becomes infectious and well, I won't work as hard as I used to true, but your efficiency goes through the roof and your successes go up and all my clients.
[30:00] Dr. Doug Brackmann: It takes about a year or two to really break this, this fear based driven habit. But once you do. Then, you know, better has no finish line and you can really launch your world into something better.
[30:13] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: So for the listener, who's all in on this, they're bought in. They're saying, okay, now what, what do I do, Doug?
[30:20] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: Maybe it's something they can do in the next 24 to 48 hours, or maybe it's a habit or a routine to install into their lives. What's actionable
[30:29] Dr. Doug Brackmann: here. So the simplest trick that I teach people is to discern. And so being able to figure out, well, that's my monkey mind. There's my belief system, you know, judging and thinking and did it, and being able to feel and contrast that to actually the body.
[30:48] Dr. Doug Brackmann: And. Very simply, you know, the gratitude practice is fantastic. Meditation is what I teach. And I start everybody at a one minute, five breath meditation in the morning, because your monkey mind will very quickly go, I don't need to do that. Forget it. It's not that important. It, it, it, and try to actually talk you out of it and being able to see.
[31:12] Dr. Doug Brackmann: That I cold plunge and I do all these things to really not let that part of me control me. And you know, what do I do instead is I remember to take a breath and really anchor myself into the body and feel the experience in the present moment. And why is that so important and how does that change the rest of your life is because the thing that's living in your head, this, this judging constant chattering is always driven by fear.
[31:49] Dr. Doug Brackmann: Always. It's a problem solver designed to solve problems that are fear based. And so you'll, you'll miss your life. More importantly, you'll set expectations and never meet them. You'll never feel like a success. You'll never actually feel reality. And so being able to just, you know, a simple one word gratitude practice, come up with a, you know, what am I grateful for?
[32:12] Dr. Doug Brackmann: Water. And you will hear your head. Oh, that's stupid. And you take the breath in and really think about a glass of really good, clean water and swallowing. And how does that feel in the body? It's like, Oh, that is good. And that will change the rest of your day. Because it's priming the body. It's, you know, availability heuristic.
[32:34] Dr. Doug Brackmann: It's called where the body is actually cued then to actually notice things that it's been tuning out. And your kids love this. Your wife loves this, the people around you love this because then you're much more likely to meet them with that same curiosity and experience them.
[32:50] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: Doug, this is incredible.
[32:52] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: For the listener who wants to learn more, go deeper on this, where can they find you, follow you, listen to your podcast, buy your book, etc.
[32:59] Dr. Doug Brackmann: Yeah. So everything Dr. Doug is I am driven. com. Yeah. Megan and I, Megan, my cohost, she was number one pick for volleyball, six foot four. She's Ohio state. We talk about all this stuff.
[33:12] Dr. Doug Brackmann: And then I got a new book coming up. My old, you know, the driven, um, understanding and harnessing the genetic gifts of Navy SEALs, entrepreneurs, professional athletes, and maybe you available on audio. You can get the first three chapters, I think, free on my website. On my website. And then, uh, I got a new book coming out in April that I'm excited about.
[33:31] Dr. Doug Brackmann: So things are cooking. Yeah. Yeah.
[33:34] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: All right. Well, we'll keep an eye out for the book, Doug. Thank you for the insights. Thank you for the time.
[33:41] Dr. Doug Brackmann: Appreciate what you're doing in the world. Thanks brother. That's fun.
[33:47] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: Thanks for listening. If you want to apply these principles into your life, let's talk, you can see the limited spaces that are open on my calendar at JimHarshawJr.com/apply, where you can sign up for a free one time coaching call directly with me. And don't forget to grab your action plan. Just go to JimHarshawJr.com/action. And lastly, iTunes tends to suggest podcasts with more ratings and reviews more often. You would totally make my day if you. Give me a rating and review those go a long way in helping me grow the podcast audience.
[34:20] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: Just open up your podcast app. If you have an iPhone, do a search for success through failure, select it, and then scroll the whole way to the bottom where you can leave the podcast, a rating and a review. Now I hope this isn't just another podcast episode for you. I hope you take action on what you learned here today.
[34:38] Jim Harshaw, Jr.: Good luck. And thanks for listening.
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